Ģeniāls produkts – Comfort Wipe

Ja arī tev paša pakaļas slaucīšana sagādā galvassāpes, palīgā nāks “Comfort Wipe” – viens rokas vēziens un lieta darīta. Interesanti, kas varētu būt nākamais šī uzņēmuma produkts? Krāniņa turētājs?

Reklāmas klipiņš tiešām pārliecinošs :D

Papildus dialoga izraksts no “Comfot Wipe” klientu atbalsta dienesta ikdienas:

CALL CENTER LOG: 06/15/09 11:46 CST

TELEBRANDS CUSTOMER SERVICE REPRESENTATIVE
TeleBrands, this is Steven speaking, how can I help you?

CALLER
Hi, Steve-o! I need to return a product I ordered. It broke.

CSR
All right sir, I’m sorry to hear that. Do you have the order number with you? It can usu…

CALLER
Yup, got it right here: A662-BN2453-02334.

CSR
Just a moment, sir. I see, OK we do not accept returns on this particular product.

CALLER
Yes, well, it broke. It was faulty.

CSR
Sir, the Comfort Wipe explicitly does not come with a warranty.

CALLER
I noticed. You don’t stand behind your product?

CSR
Sir, I try to stand as far away from that product as possible.

CALLER
Well none of that matters because there is a whole asswad – pun fully intended – of consumer protection laws which say you can’t sell faulty merchandise. This Comfort Wipe broke during its first use. You owe me a refund. I know this, you know this, so let’s do this thing. Otherwise I start talking to your manager and start shipping turds to you. What’s it going to be?

CSR
-pause- Let me process a refund for you sir.

CALLER
Good lad.

CSR
OK. Let me pull up the Returns screen. I’ll need to ask some questions first…. Oh lord. OK, how did the product fail?

CALLER
Don’t worry, it wasn’t on my ass.

CSR
Please do not tell me how you were using it sir. I just want to know how it broke.

CALLER
I was using it on the bus.

CSR
Damnit, what did I just tell you?

CALLER
I’m trying to explain. I have to take the bus everywhere now because my girlfriend owns the car, and while “we’re rethinking things” I’m stuck without a ride. Anyways, the bus is just full of people, right, but not good people like you or me. Nasty people. And I was waving around my Comfort Wand on the bus so people would give me a little more personal space. So no ass-play at all! Honest! Steven would I lie to you?

CSR
Sir…

CALLER
After all we’ve been through Steven, would I lie to you about ass-play?

CSR
…How did it get broken sir?

CALLER
The bus driver told me to get off the bus. So I bent over and was rubbing it on my ass, over my pants though, so we’re still good, and I’m all like “ooh, what you gonna do?” And then he kicked me right in the ass, and it got in the way and broke.

CSR
Sir, that’s not a valid reason for a refund. It’s not a manufacturing fault, that’s deliberate misuse.

CALLER
But none of it got on my ass! None at all Steven! After I fell down, one guy put one of the pieces in my mouth, but that’s it!

CSR
Jesus Christ sir. -long pause- The relationship between the Comfort Wipe and your ass has no relevance here. In fact, if you were using the product on your ass, that might actually strengthen your case. But because you broke your Comfort Wipe while harassing people on a bus, I cannot give you a refund.

CALLER
THIS IS JUST WHAT NAZI GERMANY MUST HAVE BEEN LIKE! -click-

p.s. šāds dampis Amazon.com nopērkams par 12$

Comments are closed.

Pin It on Pinterest

Share This

Turpinot lietot šo lapu, Jūs piekrītat, ka tiek lietotas sīkdatnes (cookies) vairāk informācijas

Šajā lapā tiek lietotas sīkdatnes (cookies), lai sniegtu Jums iespējami labāko pārlūkošanas pieredzi. Turpinot lietot šo lapu, Jūs piekrītat, ka tiek lietotas sīkdatnes (cookies).

Aizvērt